We recently travelled from our home in the UK to Australia to visit my family – a 36 hour door-to-door journey, with a 2.5 year old in tow – including two long haul flights.
I was super nervous, as I had no idea how my daughter would cope with the long journey, considering she’d never been on an airplane, or out of the country, before this trip.
I’m pleased to tell you, the transit went way better than I was expecting, and our mini traveller exceeded all our expectations, not just during the flight, but throughout all legs of the journey.
In my last post I shared with you a breakdown of everything I packed in my carry on bag to help the journey go as smoothly as possible for our family, and now I’m going to share with you my top tips for long haul flights with a toddler.
Prepare them in advance
Talk to your child about the upcoming journey and what to expect. Books or videos about travelling, particularly airplane travel, may help your toddler understand what is going to happen and help them deal with the change in routine.
The book ‘The Peaceful Plane’ was so helpful for us, and my daughter, Ada, loved it.
Not only did we read it to her daily on the lead up to our journey, we also took it with us as one of her two books on the airplane so we could keep referring to it during the flight.
It helped her understand what her role was going to be throughout the trip, and I really do feel it was a valuable resource for us.
Pack ALL the snacks
Snacks, snacks and more snacks – your toddler is going to be bored at times, and what do they usually ask for when they are bored? Yep, snacks.
Pack all the snacks your child usually likes to eat throughout the time period you will be travelling for, and then some more.
Pack snacks you know they are likely to eat, and if your child is fairly open to trying new things, maybe pack some ‘new’ and ‘exciting’ snacks for them to try for the first time.
Disclaimer: I did this, and it didn’t work out so well as my child is a fairly “fussy” eater, so she was not keen on trying any new snacks. I should have anticipated this, knowing what she is like, and only packed snacks I knew she already liked.
If you have packed enough snacks, you have not only given your child a form of killing time, but also this way you know that they will eat enough throughout the journey. Yes, there is usually a toddler meal option on the airplane (You must order this at least 24 hours in advance), but even then, are you sure your child is going to eat it?
Snacks aren’t only good to keep your child fed (especially if you don’t think they will eat much of the airplane food, as I knew Ada wouldn’t), but also to keep them occupied for periods of time, or stave off meltdowns.
Yes, snacks as bribery or a distraction tool aren’t usually my normal methods of parenting at home, but on a plane, things are different. Toddler refusing to put on their seatbelt for landing: Offer a snack and what do you know? That seatbelt remains in place and a meltdown was averted. Don’t judge me.
Be prepared for nappy changing/Toileting on an airplane
As I said in my last blog post, my daughter is still in nappies so I was armed with a pouch full of nappies, wipes, nappy bags and a foldable travel change mat, which I could easily grab out of my carry on backpack and take to the bathroom with me to change her nappy – this was a brilliant idea, as it made changes so much easier and saved space in those tiny airplane bathrooms or airport toilet cubicles when baby change facilities weren’t available.
Also, I’d advise you to practice standing nappy changes, because if your child is too big for the changing tables in the airplane toilets (Ada only just fit and is a pretty small 2 year old), you’re not going to have much other choice than to change them standing.
If your child is toilet trained, I’d still suggest carrying baby wipes, as they come in handy for everything! And depending on your kiddo’s size you may want to bring a foldable child toilet seat to help them be more comfortable, especially if they are used to using one at home.
If your child is in the process of toilet training, you may want to consider using pull ups during the journey – sometimes you just won’t be able to get them to a toilet immediately, and while it may be confusing for them to be back in a pull up, it will possibly be less upsetting for them lest they have an accident around a whole lot of strangers.
Pack activities to keep them engaged:
You know your child best, and you probably know where their interests lie. Pack activities accordingly.
One of the best activities we took, which I think is a pretty well-rounded activity for any child (so might be one you’d like to consider!) was a Melissa and Doug Water Wow book.
Ada had never used one before but was totally taken by it, straight away – in fact, she used it for an hour straight on one of the flights.
She also then continued to use it throughout our holiday, as we kept it in our nappy bag and whenever we were out eating at a restaurant or café (or visiting breweries, as we did a bit of, on this trip!) we whipped it out for her and it kept her entertained for a decent chunk every time.
Because it dries, it can be reused over and over again – and all you need is water! Honestly, I’ve been raving about this item to anyone and everyone, I would recommend it to any families who are travelling with toddlers or young children.
Even if you’re not usually a screen time family, you may want to give it a go, if only as a special condition of travel days – never underestimate the power of children’s TV and movies to keep a child entertained on a long journey.
That quiet time could honestly save your sanity, and save your child from a meltdown.
Travel can be overwhelming, for all of us. A little rest time with a screen can do wonders.
There are lots of great, educational shows out there, so pick some of those and download them onto a tablet in order to be able to watch them offline while on the flight or at the airport.
We made sure to download some of Ada’s favourite shows and movies from Netflix, BBC iPlayer and Disney+ onto my tablet so she could watch them.
It was a good shout as well, as Ada’s short height stopped her from being able to watch the inbuilt airplane screens properly – although, to her credit, she did give it a go, and when I bopped down to her height, all I could see from her viewpoint was very dark shapes on the screen.
You can see each and every activity we packed for the flight in the video below.
Pack spare clothing for your child and yourself too
As a parent of a toddler, you’re probably already accustomed to carrying around a change of clothes in your toddler’s bag/nappy changing bag, for the inevitable muckiness that somehow happens on a daily basis with a child.
Whether it’s food, mud, pee, poop or even vomit, you’re always going to make sure you have a spare change of clothes for your toddler.
Now, because you’re on an airplane and your toddler will potentially be on your lap for some (or all, if they are travelling as a lap infant) of the flight, it’s possible that whatever muck ends up on your child may also end up on you. Plan accordingly, and make sure you pack a change of clothes for yourself too.
I’ve heard way too many horror stories of a child having a nappy blowout/projectile vomit incident on an airplane, with the parents lap they are sat on copping the brunt of it – with no change of clothes in sight.
That doesn’t sound like a situation I’d like to be in, what about you?
I must add as well that I also took a pair of pyjamas on the airplane with us, as since we were travelling for 36 hours in total, there was going to be a full “night time sleep” in there somewhere for my toddler.
We chose which flight we wanted her to consider “overnight” and dressed her in her pyjamas and brushed her teeth before settling down for a sleep during that particular section of the journey.
So, technically, we had two changes of clothes with us.
Create a bedtime routine on the airplane
As I just mentioned above, we chose a section of the journey to be considered “nighttime/sleep time” for our toddler.
We coordinated this at the time that made the most sense to us – on the first flight we took. It left London at 9pm, so it was past her usual bedtime by that point, but she had earlier taken a later nap than usual on the coach journey to London, which meant she was able to stay up that late.
When changing her into her pyjamas and brushing her teeth, we tried to keep everything as normal to her bedtime routine at home as possible, then she had cuddles with us (her usual way of falling asleep), and then laid flat, stretched out on the seat between my husband and I.
If your airline allows the use of inflatable footrests/toddler beds that set up in the footwell to create a lie flat position, then great, I’d highly suggest using one of those.
However, our airline didn’t allow them (Qantas), but luckily our daughter is pretty small, so was able to sleep comfortably just on the seat itself – she slept for 8.5 hours straight!
So don’t worry if you can’t use one of those footrests, I’m sure your toddler will find a comfortable way to sleep regardless.
Gate check your stroller/use airport strollers
We took our umbrella fold stroller with us, both for use in the airports to make transporting our luggage as well as a small human from place to place, as well as for use during our time in Australia.
At London, we were able to take our stroller all the way to the gate, where they then checked it in (We just had to make sure to get a special tag for it when we checked in our luggage).
Depending on the airline and the airport, you may get your stroller back at the gate while on your layover, but with Qantas/Singapore Changi Airport, we did not receive our stroller back until baggage claim in Brisbane.
However, in Singapore there were airport strollers that were available to use, so that was a lifesaver for us.
On our journey back, we had to check in our stroller when we checked in our baggage, but we got lucky again as Qantas had strollers for use until we reached the gate at Brisbane airport.
If you’ve got an expensive stroller I’d suggest not taking it, and instead getting a cheaper on for travel – we got ours for $5 on Facebook Marketplace, so weren’t too concerned if it got broken during the journey (It didn’t, however the stroller bag I put it in did end up with a few tears, so I’m glad I put it inside something!)
Let them run around as much as possible before the flight
Your toddler is going to be confined to a seat for a long time once they are on that plane – even if you plan to walk them up and down the aisles as much as they need, they still will need to stay seated throughout boarding, taxiing, take off and reaching altitude before that seatbelt sign goes off and they can wander a little.
Make the most of the space in the airport and let them run free. Don’t worry about what other people may think – Better they are a bit rambunctious now than once they are on a plane, in a confined space, in close proximity to so many other travellers.
Get to the airport early
It’s not a secret that normal, everyday things tend to take longer when you have a small human in tow. A flight is not something you want to be running late for, so make sure you allow even more time than usual to get to the airport/before your departure.
Not only will you then have extra time for a dawdling, curious toddler who wants to explore everything the see between security and your gate, you will save yourself that stress of trying to rush.
In addition, extra time is helping purely to help your toddler come to terms with the journey – travel can be overwhelming, and trying to rush a toddler who is already battling a lot of different emotions trying to cope with a new experience may tip them over the edge into meltdown mode.
Give them the space and the grace to take the time they need to continue with the journey.
Keep your expectations low. Nope, even lower
What’s that saying about expectations? The lower you keep them, the less you’ll be disappointed?
It’s true.
Plan for the worst, and then when things go better than expected, you’ll be cheering. And if things do go to the worst, well at least then you’ll be prepared!
Honestly, I think this was one of my most helpful moves – I was anticipating my toddler screaming the majority of the flight, having waking daydreams about confrontations with other passengers, and preparing how I would try to keep myself calm in such a stressful situation.
This was honestly what I prepared myself for – I also imagined flight delays, cancellations, lost baggage, my daughter getting sick on the plane – So when none of that happened, I was severely relieved!
Our travel journey going so smoothly was a bonus – but I was prepared for the worst, in case it became reality.
And an extra (but very important) one: Focus on your toddler, not other travellers
If your toddler does have a meltdown, gets sick, won’t sleep etc, calmly deal with your child how you normally would at home. Provide them with the same love and care you would usually – and block out anyone else on the plane. They do not exist in that moment.
In that moment, your priority should be helping your child, not worrying about what strangers think about your child’s behaviour or your response to it.
Your child deserves your full attention, don’t let it be dragged away from them by the stares or comments of strangers. They DO NOT matter, and you will never see them again in your life.
Your child, however, will always be your child.
That being said, if a fellow passenger is being a d**khead about your child, have no qualms about (calming) asking them to mind their own business, remind them of normal toddler brain development and behaviour, point out that their toddler (and you) is obviously having a harder time than they are right now, and then report them to the air stewards if they continue to give you grief.
Also politely reminding them that plane travel is a form of public transport, and if they are bothered by other passengers, maybe in the future they might consider renting their own private jet…!
All of us adults were toddlers once, and a lot of people tend to forget that.
Happy travelling, families!!
Related: What’s in my carry on bag: Long haul flight with a toddler